Dore Talk

We have been on the programme for about 15 months now with a gap last summer where nothing worked to get my beloved daughter (aged 10) to do her exercises. It has been hard to stay motivated as we have seen little progress over and above the progress she was making prior to her enrolment on the programme. In fact my daughter is undergoing the statement process as she is now 4 years behind in her literacy. However I see lots of small things improve and hope for the reading to follow on.

We started the mental tasks last week - fantastic timing just before the sats...

Our last results:

Equilibrium Tests:                                Sensory Analysis

1: 93                                                  Somatosensory: 100

2: 94                                                  Visual 84

3: 78                                                  Vestibular 78

4: 73                                                  Composite 80

Wish us luck... 

I am very glad to have found this site as I do not feel particularly supported by our local centre. They only seem to be interested in our compliance rather than in what we experience. There is rarely any positive feedback just the emphasis on compliance. It makes motivating a 10 year old with self esteem issues a nightmare. We had no idea until two visits ago that there were such things as performing mental tasks as well as the exercises. She  has been counting and singing for a while to make them more interesting. Reading the posts in this forum has made me realise just how uninterested in us our program specialist has been.  

Hi and welcome to the forum. Sorry to hear about the lack of support from your programme specialist. Perhaps you could make an appointment with someone different next time. Our specialist is fantastic and my daughter has formed a very strong bond with her and listens to everything she tells her. It's very important to get positive feedback on your Dore visits so it may be worth trying different specialists until you find one you're comfortable with. My daughter is on mentals at the moment so I know how stressful it can be at first. It does get better though and, in my daughters case, schoolwork is becoming a lot easier. Don't worry that you're only seeing small changes at the moment. I'm sure the bigger changes will start to happen now that your daughter is on mentals. Keep posting on this forum. You will get lots of support here. It helps to talk to people who know what you're going through. Don't give up. You're doing the best possible thing for your daughter. Keep in touch. Good Luck.

DEBBIExx

Have a chat next time you go, but if you took a break last summer, it sounds like they are concerned about the compliance. Progress is faster if you just keep plodding on. I'm sure there have been changes taking place, but sometimes you have to look a little harder as they can be small ones.

I have been through the Statement process, and believe me, it is very stressful - and you have the SATS to cope with too. I hope you are getting help from the Parent Partnership in your local area. Unfortunately, we were unsuccessful in our request for a statement, despite going to Tribunal, but Dore has certainly turned our life around. You will see the biggest improvements once mentals start. Like you, our Centre didn't mention them, but I knew they were coming from Ellie and others you were chatting on the Dore forums. I was surprised when we started them, as I didn't think we were ready, but Harry has coped well overall.

I wish you luck - keep us posted.

PS. Your scores are great - better than ours! :) 

Thanks for your reply. I think part of our issue is that our centre is fairly new. For the first 1/2 of the year we hardly saw the same person twice and then came what was our current specialist. In all fairness to her she tried to assist but she was so wooden and completely failed to grasp the problems I was having with my daughter. I was at my wits end - I tried small bribes and even promised a trip to Chessington if she did a whole weeks worth of exercises and taking a friend for two. Nothing worked, I was completely exhausted. I cannot physically force a child to them. Trust me it wasn't my choice to take a break. Olivia finally admitted that she didn't believe that the exercises were working and at the next appointment after a pasting from the specialist I did explain what the issues were. She just didn't seem to get the fact that I needed her help to motivate my daughter, her lack of empathy was astounding. Everytime we had any contact with her it was like she was reading from a script. Whilst my daughter struggles with her literacy skills she is very bright - she is forecast to get at least a 5 in science (borderline 6) and a solid 4 in maths - this is a child with a reading age of 7. Our specialist couldn't understand that directing her comments to me was insulting to my child, I create the time and space for the exercises but it is Olivia who does them. Well she wasn't our specialist last time, we have another new one. He seems nice, he explained a lot more about what the results of each test meant, and the activities they represented. He was quietly encouraging and Olivia seemed to like him. Lets hope this is a better relationship.

The exercises are going well, I've been a bit more leniant as I don't want her getting discouraged again but am a bit concerned that there may be side effects like trouble sleeping, moods etc just around what is already a stressful time for her. I think we are ready for more of a challenge but I am ready for the potential difficulties !!!

I have admit to being a bit concerned that whilst her scores seem pretty good to me we haven't seen any significant improvements. Lots of things have changed - improved self esteem - she now plays in the netball team (second team), she is playing a duet on her clarinet at the school concert and we have grade 1 piano to undertake next term. Her reading has improved and her ability to translate her thoughts on to paper, her spelling is definately better as is her ability to retain them, her thought process are sharper than ever. The gap between her thoughts and her ability to put them on paper is slightly greater but her ability to cope with the ensuing frustration is much better. She seems much more emotionally stronger.

I am rambling sorry, I was trying to think of the things that have changed for the better .  

 

Perhaps, as Debbie has suggested, you can ask to see someone else next time. I'm sorry to hear of the problems, but she has made noticeable gains and mentals really do help to pull everything together. For us, Harry finally has the ability to learn and is doing well, but has a lot of catching up to do. He still has traits of ADD, where he just can't sit still, but his concentration has improved a lot. He also had very self-esteem, but no longer. Keep at it - its not easy. I wish you luck.

Hi there I just wanted to say that I can really understand what you are on about re Dore therapists. It is imperative that these people are encouraging and give good explainations with regard to test results..they also need some good basic education re the realm of lerarning diabilities. My son is nearly 10 years and dyslexic and we have recently changed to the Christchurch office in New Zealand. This is a new centre and the therapists are also new. She bangs on about compliance giving no thought to the stress that is involved with getting children to reluctantly do their exercises, let alone living the life of parents of a dyslexic child. Our particular woman appears to have no comprehension of delayed processing times and her idea of getting Felix to perform a mental task while exercising consists of saying to him "just say something or spell three letter words for me". Not one on his strong points, he needs a bit more direction than that you crazy .......... When I suggested that she ask him words she would like him to spell she told me this was leading him? We are so unhappy about this woman we have emailed the Dore Centre and logged a complaint and asked for my sons file to be examined by a senior specialist and that someone get back to us to discuss his progress. This was about threeweeks when you feel the service is so poor, but you have to continue because there is no doubt that it is helping my son. I do believe a sound attachment to the specialist is important and above all the clients need to feel confident. I to am now rambling. Our changes have not come as bolts from the blue but every now and then something will happen that keeps us going. I have recently started a journal and am recording our journey in this I find this very helpfull. Just keep the faith! and don't slap anyone. I am getting Felix to write to some other kids on the kids page in the hope it might be cathartic, maybe your daughter might do the same. Deb from NZ